When Family Courts Fail Fathers, Children Pay the Price

By any measure, I am a fit and loving parent. The courts themselves have acknowledged this. Yet for years, I have been denied the most basic right of fatherhood: time with my daughter. My story is not unique — it is emblematic of a broken system that too often allows parental alienation to masquerade as justice.

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In 2008, after my daughter’s second birthday, her mother began denying me access to her. What followed was a relentless cycle of restraining orders, false allegations, and endless hearings. Judges dismissed claims of domestic violence as unfounded, yet still imposed restrictions that kept me from my child. Even when official reports documented the warmth of my relationship with my daughter — noting our conversations about school, science, and family, and her joy in our time together — the system continued to erect barriers.

The opposing party has criticized me for filing multiple petitions. Yes, I have filed three: the original paternity suit and two petitions for modification. And I will file as many as necessary. That is not harassment — it is persistence. It is the refusal of a father to abandon his child. The real question is not why I continue to fight, but why the courts tolerate reckless disregard for a child’s right to both parents.

This is not just about me. It is about the thousands of fathers and mothers across the country who face similar battles. Family courts too often enable one parent to erase the other, reducing children’s lives to half of what they should be. This is not protection — it is abuse, carried out under the color of law.

The consequences are devastating. Children deprived of meaningful relationships with both parents suffer emotionally, socially, and academically. Parents who care deeply are left broken, financially drained, and stigmatized by false accusations. Meanwhile, the system congratulates itself on “protecting” children while ignoring the harm it perpetuates.

It is time for reform. Family courts must stop enabling parental alienation and start enforcing shared parenting as the default. Judges must be held accountable for decisions that sever parent-child bonds without cause. And lawmakers must recognize that the reckless disregard of parental rights is not just a private tragedy — it is a public crisis.

I have complied with every order, attended every program, and paid every fee. The courts themselves have declared me a fit parent. Yet I have not seen or spoken with my daughter since January 2015. That is not justice. That is cruelty.

Children deserve both parents. Parents deserve fairness. And society deserves a family court system that protects relationships instead of destroying them. Until that day comes, I — and countless others — will continue to fight. Not out of anger, but out of love. Because no child should ever grow up believing that one parent simply disappeared.