How To Fight Parental Alienation ~ If you've been systematically pushed out of your child’s life by a former partner who repeatedly criticizes and deprecates you in front of your child, then you are all too familiar with parental alienation.
"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."
"Es peligroso tener razón en aquellas cosas en las que los poderosos están equivocados" ~ Voltaire
This story kinda lifts my spirits? Why? Because for me it re-enforces that I am not the only one in the exact same situation in the Miami-Dade Family Courts. Mr. Silva also been in his long-running legal fight with his wife and battle against the Family Court System here in Miami-Dade County's 11th Judicial Circuit to and for his two daughters.
The relief I have and immensely enjoy is that my son has been with his father since his birth. And that no one, especially his mom, has never interfered and/or interrupted and or challenged my ability to Parent and raise our son. Moreover, I have been praised for the good job that I have done as a Father.
Conclusion... The "REAL STORY"...
The Miami Herald should be reporting is the "inequities of the Family Court System".
Just as the child suffers psychologically from removal from the adult, so is the adult traumatized by removal from the child. The psychological trauma to the adult caused by such acts...
Across the country women, children, AND MEN are becoming the victims of judges and the court system. It is time that we...
Posted by Children's Rights on Thursday, August 20, 2015
Excerpts from a 2011 Interview with Brian Ludmer.
Brian Ludmer is perhaps the foremost Parental Alienation attorney. Although this is used as an advertisement for a different law firm, the points remain valid.
"Q: What can you do to combat an alienating parent?
Brian Ludmer: Well, the key thing is you need to strictly, frequently, and early on assert your right to the access you are supposed to have with your child. Most of the problems result from people being too timid or delaying the problem thinking there is some therapeutic answer. You can’t really stop false allegations from being made, and quite often the fact they're being made can be used to your advantage ....
Most alienators will fold rather than actually go on the stand at a trial ...question the aligned parent under oath during the case, you can get some amazing admissions that then inform the custody assessment and the judge. So, the idea is to expose them — not allow them to hide behind false affidavits and lawyer’s letters — and that typically will force their hand. [This is NOT legal advice.] "
How To Fight Parental Alienation ~ If you've been systematically pushed out of your child’s life by a former partner who repeatedly criticizes and deprecates you in front of your child, then you are all too familiar with parental alienation.
Childrens Rights Florida - Family Law Reform, Inc. - Fix Family Courts Divorce and Family Law Reform - Operation Cps...
Posted by Family Justice & Child Protection Worldwide Reform Committee on Saturday, July 11, 2015
On April 9th, 2012 The Miami Herald published an article (poorly) titled "Medley councilman a guardian for at-risk kids, despite arrest". An excerpt from the article states: "A loophole in the Florida law allowed Gerardo Silva to deny he had ever been arrested because the records were sealed and expunged.".
Medley councilman a guardian for at-risk kids despite previous arrest - River Cities - MiamiHerald.com
The article was located at the following website address
URL: http://miamiherald.typepad.com/nakedpolitics/2012/04/despite-previous-arrest-medley-councilman-a-guardian-to-at-risk-kids-thanks-to-legal-loophole.html URL: http://miamiherald.typepad.com/nakedpolitics/2012/04/despite-previous-arrest-medley-councilman-a-guardian-to-at-risk-kids-thanks-to-legal-loophole.html 
Elected City of Medley Councilman Mr. Gerardo Silva, Jr. is being thrown under the bus by The Miami Herald. This news story (which is horribly written) is, in my opinion, slanderous against the councilman, and obviously politically motivated. Most importantly The Miami Herald has once again failed to see THE REAL STORY: THE INEQUITIES OF THE FAMILY COURT SYSTEM. This would've been a much better title for this news report.
Another great title for the Miami Herald's news story could've been "How can a guy do all that and yet the court does not allow him to see his children?" This is also what City of Medley Councilman Gerardo Silva, Jr. told the Herald's reporter. Mr. Silva is a former landscape company owner, Vice President of the PTSA, a Guardian Ad Litem (Florida Bar Approved) and based on my research has NO criminal record. Not suprisingly...Mr. Silva's ex-wife made false allegations of Domestic Violence against him and he admirably volunteered this information on his application to the Florida Guardian Ad Litem Program. False allegations of Domestic Violence, a major problem in the United States, is also an element of my family court case. When you read the aforementioned Miami Herald article you will see that it is out of context and it is just a political smear campaign.
I have repeatedly contacted and even personally met with one their reporter regarding my Family Court Case. Obviously they did not taken any interest in my story.
"How can a guy do all that and yet the court does not allow him to see his children?" ~ Gerardo Silva, Jr., Florida Guardian Ad Litem, City Councilman, and more
Hi Bio-Mom
I see you have found our little club here and you've decided to troll around for a bit. I first would like to say "welcome" on behalf of the men and women who suffer daily inside and outside these pages. We are glad you are here.
Hi Bio-Mom
I see you have found our little club here and you've decided to troll around for a bit. I first would like to say "welcome" on behalf of the men and women who suffer daily inside and outside these pages. We are glad you are here.
Feel free to take your time and peruse the stories of men and women who have lost everything. Take in the agony and the pain, read the horror stories of men who haven't seen their children in 6 weeks, 6 months or 6 years. You will notice that all the stories share a familiar tone. The pain is real. The disbelief is palpable.
The constant barrage of men ready to give up is unfortunately true. They may give up and stop fighting vindictive exes for their children and just move on, only to be later called a deadbeat loser from the same woman that deprived him of his children. They may give up and eat a bullet, jump from a bridge or tie a noose around their neck and say their final goodbye. You win, they lose.
You are now an accessory to murder. Stick around and look at the pictures of the children that are left behind. These are the other victims. The victims without a voice in all of this. Had they had a choice they would almost always choose to have a loving caring father by their side. You deprive them of that. Not only do you assist in the murdering of fathers, but you're also a child abuser. 
Congratulations!!!
Be sure to keep coming back to our little club here. Make jokes about how we are all domestic abusers who feel we have some ghastly privilege of fathering our children. Keep your kids close to you, be sure you cash that child support check and keep the children from Daddy if he misses a payment. It's only a fair punishment for him.
Make him suffer.
Make him hurt so bad he stays awake at night crying because he misses his kids so badly.
Make him out to be the deadbeat you just know he is.
Make his feel the depths of depression and despair by keeping his kids from him.
Threaten to have him arrested and thrown in jail for inability to pay child support.
You're cruising now bio-mom. You show them who is boss. Don't allow him to talk to his kids on the phone.
Don't allow him to have one extra minute of "visitation".
Marginalize him and make him feel what a scumbag he truly is.
Don't tell him of your children's accomplishment or how they are doing in school.
Keep any and all medical records from him.
Keep him guessing who is with his children and where they are living.
Keep doing what you are doing bio-mom.
Now we all know who the boss is.
It was never the judges or lawyers who caused all this. It was you.
Now look down at your children and realize everything you have done to your ex has also been done to them. See, you are a child abuser after all.
ANOTHER EASTER WITHOUT MY DAUGHTER
It's human nature to seek out a partner in life, and to possibly marry and have children. Unfortunately the matrimonial establishment, as we are all aware, is being methodically torn down by a demoralized society. Sadly the divorce rate is still on the rise and the foundation of marriage is being devalued and is crumbling. As adults we learn to adapt and move on when divorce attacks our lives but for children this is another story. They are the real victims of divorce and unfortunately they will suffer dearly from our selfishness and in most cases follow the same path of destruction if not worse.
As a nation we have been granted certain civil rights by our constitution. Through the years it has been amended to better the lives of many Americans. The two most notable changes have come to Women in the 1920s and with African Americans in the 1960s. These rights were long overdue for both segments of our nation but thankfully we realized our mistakes and corrected them. This was not an easy journey for either of these crusades but through dedication and perseverance the bells of liberty rang loudly and victory was achieved.
Unfortunately we have reached yet another fork in the road and with that comes another challenge to the American people. "We've worked hard for women's rights, but we have to watch out that the pendulum doesn't swing the other way" says Ruthie J. of the Reach FM. Ironically the pendulum has already swung far to one side and this time the male gender is being demonized by erroneous and fraudulent information.
Males are being portrayed as callus, uncaring, and without emotion. We are being taught that men represent 95% of abuse in this nation against women. These and many other false statistics are being recklessly strewn throughout society and none of it is true. Yes, women are being abused by men that is a fact. striking a woman is abhorrent to the highest degree and should be dealt with appropriately but men are abused at an equal rate and they are being ignored.
According to a study by the Center for Disease Control men represent 38% of domestic violence related injuries. Compound that with the fact that only 0.9% of men report abuse verses 8.5% of women and I think we have a pretty equal degree of violence between partners.
The cornerstone of this "abuse" is VAWA the Violence Against Women Act. It was passed into law by Bill Clinton in 1994 and has been extended by every subsequent President. This law funnels Billions of dollars into discriminatory education and propaganda that violates men's civil rights. Many times DVIs or Domestic Violence Injunctions are used as a tool in divorce, child custody or just vengeance against a partner, most often against males. This is because the system of acquiring a DVI is simple and requires no evidence, witnesses or prior police reports. Just the word of an alleged victim making a claim of abuse. 
The repercussions of these orders are devastating and many times result in a violation, arrest and complete destruction of one's life. Even in cases when they are dismissed, a serious blemish remains on the falsely accused forever; how does that look to potential employers who almost always perform background checks prior to employment? This must be stopped and a better system of protecting all victims of domestic violence should be put in place.
I hope to help bring awareness to gender discrimination and help provide support for men who are abused. There are programs to help women of abuse but nothing for men. My website will provide more information on the facts, my personal experiences and the stories of those who have been victims of this heinous tactic of relationship vengeance. Men and women should truly have equal rights and currently the scales are unjustly tilted. Let's work together to end domestic violence and not vilify one gender as inherently abusive. "United we stand, divided we fall" A powerful statement that we must never forget.Thank you,Tom LemonsFounder, False DVI Reports
UPDATE #1Epidemic of False Allegations and Restraining Order Abuse (See YouTube Video)False Allegations Of Domestic Violence, By Tom Lemons (See YouTube Video)The Impact Of False Allegations Against Men (See YouTube Video)False Allegations (See YouTube Video)False Allegations - Only Fathers With $$ Can Fight Back (See YouTube Video)Your Rights Against False Allegations of Domestic Violence (See YouTube Video)False Allegation Summit Gordon Smith.wmv (See YouTube Video)Dr. Phil - Woman falsely accused husband of domestic violence and abuse to have him jailed (See YouTube Video)
UPDATE #2
Gordon Smith of FLAIR, former Executive Director will be on WDEL tomorrow discussing false allegations.See Facebook Post
UPDATE #3
VAWA IS NO MORE!!!GOP BLOCKS VAWA -House GOP Blocks Violence Against Women Act (VAWA)
The International Access and Visitation Centers conference was held in Toronto in April of 2013
PAAO was there and spoke to most of the 200 or so practitioners. Of course all were familiar with alienation and it's results. Everyone was not only gratified to see PAAO at the event, they all also acknowledged that PA is either a form of Domestic violence or on the continuum of Domestic Violence behaviors.
Still not sure what all this is about? Dr. Shirley Moore explains...
PART 1 PART 2
From Dr. Stephen Baskerville, political science professor & author of Taken Into Custody: The War Against Fathers, Marriage & The Family. (unpaid advertisement) http://www.stephenbaskerville.net
Remain an Equal Parent to your Child!
We only support organizations who show an understanding that children need both parents, and that either parent is equally capable of the choice to perpetrate hate or declare peace. ~~~~~~~~~
Brenda Hosmanparents who lost custody of children for no reason what so ever at all.
SHARE YOUR STORY!!!!!!!!! SHARE YOUR STORY!!!!!!!!!!
PADRES Y ABUELOS POR LOS NIÑOS SEPARADOS DE SU FAMILIA- ROSARIO, ARGENTINA CUSTODIA PATERNA - Audio institucional de nuestra organización:¿Que pedimos a las autoridades?Nuestra lucha se centra el derecho de los niños a un vínculo sano con sus dos padres y toda su familia luego de un divorcio o separación.- ¡NO MAS NIÑOS REHENES DEL DIVORCIO!Denuncia que la agredieron familiares de su ex pareja y resultó ser un vecinoviso at CUSTODIA PATERNA 
PADRES Y ABUELOS POR LOS NIÑOS SEPARADOS DE SU FAMILIA- ROSARIO, ARGENTINA CUSTODIA PATERNA - Audio institucional de nuestra organización:¿Que pedimos a las autoridades?Nuestra lucha se centra el derecho de los niños a un vínculo sano con sus dos padres y toda su familia luego de un divorcio o separación.- ¡NO MAS NIÑOS REHENES DEL DIVORCIO!Denuncia que la agredieron familiares de su ex pareja y resultó ser un vecinoviso at CUSTODIA PATERNA
El Juzgado de lo Penal ha condenado a una mujer a una multa como autora responsable de un delito de denuncia falsa en grado de tentativa después de que denunciara a dos familiares de su ex pareja de una supuesta agresión hacia ella y su hijo cuando en realidad había sido un vecino. La sentencia considera como hechos probados que el 8 de septiembre de 2010 fue remitido al Juzgado de Instrucción Número 4 de Palencia dos partes de lesiones confeccionados con fecha de 5 de septiembre de 2010 tanto de ella como de su hijo. Tras ser llamada a declarar en nov... more »
Post by Pro-se Winners.
www.causes.com/causes/409526-children-s-rights
Posted by American Fathers Liberation Army on Sunday, July 12, 2015
Yesterday I gazed out the window watching fireworks and was really missing my angel but I cannot call her because I am...
Posted by The Fathers' Rights Movement on Wednesday, June 19, 2013
ICYMI:The Florida Bar's Professional Ethics Committee --- after some minor amendments -- has OK'd a proposed ethics...
Posted by The Florida Bar on Wednesday, August 5, 2015
Jan, you fail to mention the following things:(1) The ages of your adult children at the time of the divorce and their...
Posted by Dirty Rotten Lawyers on Sunday, December 9, 2012
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, August 10, 2015
STOP THE HEARTBREAK JUDGE MANNO-SCHURR ~~ 11th Judicial Circuit Family Court... http://bit.ly/1VBlVaG
Posted by David Inguanzo on Monday, October 5, 2015
Happy Birthday Zoraya!Stand Up For Zoraya
Posted by David Inguanzo on Sunday, August 2, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
Posted by Children's Rights on Monday, October 5, 2015
As a single father of two daughters, one ILLEGALLY abducted 424 days ago (no contact allowed) by a criminal judge and His collusive cadre of FAMILY LAW INDUSTRIALISTS and a falsly-accusing, Alienating mother, I am so grateful for your blog and the others whom continue the important fights while in protracted pain...
ReplyDeleteAlan Ernesto Phillips on Google+
althepal55 on YouTube
althepal55 on Twitter
www.blindbulldog.com
(please feel free to post my story and vids! They were designed to help others who feel alone and like no one wants to hear their sad - sometimes unbelievable tales of court-criminals.)
After two years of gathering scores of substantiated complaints our group in Shasta County just got one criminal, double-dipping poster-child of abuse "judge" Jack Halpin removed from the bench.. His fellow lawyers, AOC'rs and suck-up media... want to call it a "retirement!"
http://www.redding.com/news/2012/may/03/long-time-judge-jack-halpin-retires/
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The Violence Against Women Act Ignores Half the Problem ~ By Anna Rittgers
DeleteThe 2011 Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act (VAWA) will provide funding for programs to address domestic violence and will expand the act’s provisions to include services for gays and lesbians. Theoretically, male victims of violence are eligible for help, too. But did you know that? I thought not.
The problem with reauthorizing VAWA is that doing so would perpetuate the notion that domestic violence is something that happens only to women. While it is true that VAWA has evolved over time and now ensures that male victims of partner violence can avail themselves of VAWA benefits and services, the very name of the act implies otherwise. It is quite likely that a male victim would not know he can seek help, given the name of the act.
The image of the abuser is almost always a guy. But this simply isn’t the case. One of the pioneers of the study of family violence was sociologist Richard J. Gelles. Gelles wrote a seminal 1999 article for the old Women’s Quarterly, then a publication of the Independent Women’s Forum, on the “hidden victims” of violence.[i] Gelles admitted that 25 years earlier he had overlooked something important when, in the course of doing research, he meet a couple he called Faith and Alan. Faith had been beaten by boyfriends, her ex-husband, and her husband. Faith’s troubles became the focus of Gelles’s article. Gelles barely noted Faith’s violence towards men, which included breaking Alan’s bones and stabbing a man while he read the newspaper. Faith’s violence merited a mere footnote.
We know more about intimate violence directed at men than we did when Gelles wrote his article. But for cultural reasons, it is very difficult for male victims of domestic violence to seek help. Men are seen to be physically stronger than women, and so he should be able to just “take it.” Furthermore, domestic violence awareness campaigns are horribly one-sided, and almost always portray males as the aggressor and females as victim. Police are often hardwired to view men as the perpetrator. If a man calls 911 for help when he’s being attacked by his spouse or partner, he is often subject to arrest, even if he is the only one with physical injuries.
For seventeen years, there has been unequal treatment before the law. Female aggressors are keenly aware of this unequal justice, and a 2010 study on men who sustain abuse at the hands of their female partners discovered that 67.2% reported their female aggressors made false allegations of spousal abuse. [ii] Of those with children, 48.9% of the men reported that their partners made false allegations of child abuse.[iii] In other words, VAWA’s myopic view of who perpetrates domestic violence gives female abusers an additional avenue to torment their spouses.
The name of the Act itself makes it clear that the law’s focus is to address violence against women in particular, not the general problem of domestic violence. The specialized training that judges and law enforcement officers receive ignores the reality that women are as likely as men to be perpetrators of violence. This creates a justice system that treats male aggressors more harshly than female aggressors of the same crime.
A case for establishing complicated grief as a distinct mental disorder in DSM-V - SCIENCE DIRECT - http://www.sciencedirect.com/.../pii/S0272735804000790
DeleteUnderstand that having your kids taken from you is not something the courts should be doing lightly. We all know that, but how does one push the issue before a court headed by entrenched child trafficking corruption?
My opinion is that no one should be bothering with that. Instead, it seems clear to mine eyes that "child separation anxiety" and subsequent "grief" are together "distinct mental disorder" clearly qualifying individual sufferers as "disabled".
The right of access to LEGITIMATE court services is discussed in Tennssee v. Lane.
"Title II (of the ADA) is aimed at the enforcement of a variety of basic rights, including the right of access to the courts at issue in this case, that call for a standard of judicial review at least as searching, and in some cases more searching, than the standard that applies to sexbased classifications."
In my opinion, and what I am currently working on, is not something so intimidating (at its genesis) as a full lawsuit against court officials (which almost assuredly would be doomed under the current unlawful doctrines the federal courts maintain toward snuffing out such suits), but rather something so simple that everyone reading this -- with or without much legal knowledge -- can accomplish it simply.
If diagnosed with any type of child separation anxiety (be honest) by a psychologist (or psychiatrist I guess, but I'd go with the psychologist on this one), then arguably such an evaluation would demonstrate "qualification" as a disabled person under the ADA. Legitimately based on excessive removal of one's own children.
A request for disability accommodation asking for the correction of this disability-causing problem would surpass reasonable into necessary. "Court, you are disabling me by the severity of your removal of my children. Here's the medical evidence. Here's my request that you fix your proceedings/process to knock the shit off." ~ www.facebook.com/StandupforZoraya - #StandupforZoraya
http://scholar.google.com/scholar_case... http://www.ILoveAndNeedMyDaughter.blogspot.com http://www.Causes.com/ChildrensRights Stop Emotional Child Abuse — at Lawson E. Thomas Courthouse.
http://iloveandneedmydaughter.blogspot.com/2012/04/how-can-guy-do-all-that-and-yet-court.html
Support Florida Fathers is a non-profit organization that is creating a fighting chance for fathers that deserve it. Children deserve the right to build a relationship with both parents as long as they are able and most importantly willing… Support Florida Fathers today by clicking the Contact Us link below and fill out the form to find out how to get involved…http://www.supportfloridafathers.org/
ReplyDeleteA Support and Advocacy blog for Protective Parents and innocent Children harmed by wrongdoing under the color of law, the Family Law and CPS Industries. We investigate where the media can't or won't go.
DeleteThe people "have the right to instruct their representatives, petition government for redress of grievances, and assemble freely to consult for the common good." In Keeping with the Constitution, Blind Bulldog is committed to serving the common good in Shasta County.
The following, brilliant take is from a Blind Bulldog affiliate from Southern Cal:
"The untethered aggression of family courts is due to a vacuum of institutional client advocacy--unlike criminal courts, which have firmly-established constitutional rights, strict state and federal oversight of state court judges, and a dedicated “criminal defense bar” to thwart government aggression, or civil courts that have “plaintiffs'” and “defense” bars to balance one another’s private agendas, family court has no “litigant bar.” The divorce attorneys themselves favor aggression for the simple reason identified in the movie--follow the money. Attorneys have not filled that vacuum to defend their own clients, leaving them vulnerable to the natural tendency of government to intrude. Family court litigants are, sad to say, woefully unaware of what they’re up against, and the body count shows results that are entirely predictable--but we think preventable.
Family court was created by lawyers and judges--literally--rather than the citizens it should be protecting. We’ve located the history through testimony and other documentation showing something like a Jekyll Island series of “off the record” meetings between California judges, attorneys, and bureaucrats in the 90’s to “set up” family court to their liking, then seeking what became essentially a rubber stamp granting unheard of discretion from the California legislature. This system is now unfortunately the model or trend for many states--hence our nationwide membership and approach. Citizens had virtually no input and maintain no control.
Federal courts have observed unusually broad adaptations of “federalism,” “comity,” “standing,” and “abstention” legal doctrines to leave the vacuum unoccupied by otherwise ordinary protections of federal rights for individual citizens and legal consumers. Litigants themselves are outmatched in organization--they’re a revolving door commodity. No one wants to stick around long enough to enforce reform. Hence rampant abuse in a lop-sided system of foxes guarding the henhouse, and you and I are on the ever-expanding menu."
http://childrenheldhostage.blogspot.com/?zx=1b4af2f7412f40db
ReplyDeleteChildren Held Hostage
This Blog is for the purpose of looking into the lives of Children Held Hostage by Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) by the hands of their parents, with the help of family members and others that unknowingly get sucked into contributing to this hate crime. Using my own experiences I will use this Blog as an avenue to bring awareness to those that may have the ability to help our children and to encourage those who care to have courage to speak out to bring about change.
Child(ren) Held Hostage
I hope this Blog will prove helpful in the recognition and useful in deterrence of Parental Alienation.
I will undoubtedly be using this blog in part as a therapeutic venue. It will also be used as a communication portal to my children though they may never view it.
"Parental Alienation is about parents who place their own selfish needs above those of their defenseless children and in doing so, they deny them their right to love and be loved by both parents. Alienators do not fit the stereotype of the deficient and ill-equipment parent. Instead, these parents are generally articulate, resourceful, and competent in all other aspects of their lives – except in the realm of parenting. In fact, these individuals might easily be mistaken for ideal parents, except to the properly informed, because they profess love and concern for their children. What sets these individuals apart from other dysfunctional parents is their overwhelming commitment to meeting their own needs first. In doing so, they destroy the relationship their children have with the other parent – at whatever cost. ” Dr. Reena Sommer - Internationally Recognized Divorce and Custody Consultant
Many people are troubled by these cases because it appears the guilty party was rewarded and the innocent parties wronged. The initial outcomes certainly seem unfair. However, this isn’t the worst part of these decisions. Not only are the initial outcomes unfair, these decisions put the children at risk for very negative long-term consequences.
ReplyDeleteChildren affected by divorce fare worse, on average, on nearly every measure of health and emotional well-being including a greater risk of academic problems, alcohol and drug use, poor social skills, depression and suicide, delinquency and incarceration, and poorer physical health and early mortality. The reason for all this has much to do with the fact that one of the two most important people in a child’s life is often relegated to the role of an infrequent visitor, as the above examples illustrate.
This problem may have far-reaching repercussions for all of us. Adam Lanza, the Sandy Hook school shooter, is reported to have gone downhill when divorce separated him from his father. One leading researcher calls this issue “a serious public health problem.”
These cases are based on the myth that one parent is the primary parent. Judges often decide cases this way even though there is no legal or mental health basis for it. More than three dozen studies over the past 20 years have found that when both parents are loving and competent, which is the case most of the time, a shared parenting arrangement -- with joint decision making and near-equal parenting time -- provide the best outcomes for their children.
This myth seems to have arisen from a legal presumption called the “approximation rule,” which was proposed more than 20 years ago and eventually rejected. Nonetheless, many lawyers, psychologists and judges still follow it because of its superficial neutrality and simplicity. Like many simplistic solutions, however, it’s simply wrong.
Besides creating bad outcomes for children, the approximation rule also encourages the very thing it originally hoped to prevent -- parental conflict. This pernicious myth is so destructive that many states have now moved away from it.
In Arizona, for example, that state’s custody law previously allowed judges to consider “whether one parent, both parents or neither parent has provided primary care of the child” when making custody decisions. The Arizona legislature has repealed this language and now directs courts to maximize the parenting time of both parents whenever possible.
In Nebraska, unfortunately, sole custody is still the norm. Mothers are awarded sole physical custody in 62 percent of cases and fathers in 10 percent of cases. Joint custody is awarded in only 25 percent of Nebraska divorces.
There is no legal or medical basis for the primary parent myth. Scientific research shows that every-other-weekend parenting time arrangements are harmful to children, yet they still are ordered routinely in many cases. The Legislature should stop this public health crisis and make shared parenting the norm in Nebraska as it has become in other states.
Dr. Les Veskrna
“As my sufferings mounted I soon realized that there were two ways in which I could respond to my situation -- either to react with bitterness or seek to transform the suffering into a creative force. I decided to follow the latter course.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
ReplyDeletePRO SE RIGHTS:
DeleteBrotherhood of Trainmen v. Virginia ex rel. Virginia State Bar, 377 U.S. 1; v. Wainwright, 372 U.S. 335; Argersinger v. Hamlin, Sheriff 407 U.S. 425 ~ Litigants can be assisted by unlicensed laymen during judicial proceedings.
Conley v. Gibson, 355 U.S. 41 at 48 (1957) ~ "Following the simple guide of rule 8(f) that all pleadings shall be so construed as to do substantial justice"... "The federal rules reject the approach that pleading is a game of skill in which one misstep by counsel may be decisive to the outcome and accept the principle that the purpose of pleading is to facilitate a proper decision on the merits." The court also cited Rule 8(f) FRCP, which holds that all pleadings shall be construed to do substantial justice.
Davis v. Wechler, 263 U.S. 22, 24; Stromberb v. California, 283 U.S. 359; NAACP v. Alabama, 375 U.S. 449 ~ "The assertion of federal rights, when plainly and reasonably made, are not to be defeated under the name of local practice."
Elmore v. McCammon (1986) 640 F. Supp. 905 ~ "... the right to file a lawsuit pro se is one of the most important rights under the constitution and laws."
Federal Rules of Civil Procedures, Rule 17, 28 USCA "Next Friend" ~ A next friend is a person who represents someone who is unable to tend to his or her own interest.
Haines v. Kerner, 404 U.S. 519 (1972) ~ "Allegations such as those asserted by petitioner, however inartfully pleaded, are sufficient"... "which we hold to less stringent standards than formal pleadings drafted by lawyers."
Jenkins v. McKeithen, 395 U.S. 411, 421 (1959); Picking v. Pennsylvania R. Co., 151 Fed 2nd 240; Pucket v. Cox, 456 2nd 233 ~ Pro se pleadings are to be considered without regard to technicality; pro se litigants' pleadings are not to be held to the same high standards of perfection as lawyers.
Maty v. Grasselli Chemical Co., 303 U.S. 197 (1938) ~ "Pleadings are intended to serve as a means of arriving at fair and just settlements of controversies between litigants. They should not raise barriers which prevent the achievement of that end. Proper pleading is important, but its importance consists in its effectiveness as a means to accomplish the end of a just judgment."
NAACP v. Button, 371 U.S. 415); United Mineworkers of America v. Gibbs, 383 U.S. 715; and Johnson v. Avery, 89 S. Ct. 747 (1969) ~ Members of groups who are competent nonlawyers can assist other members of the group achieve the goals of the group in court without being charged with "unauthorized practice of law."
Picking v. Pennsylvania Railway, 151 F.2d. 240, Third Circuit Court of Appeals ~ The plaintiff's civil rights pleading was 150 pages and described by a federal judge as "inept". Nevertheless, it was held "Where a plaintiff pleads pro se in a suit for protection of civil rights, the Court should endeavor to construe Plaintiff's Pleadings without regard to technicalities."
Puckett v. Cox, 456 F. 2d 233 (1972) (6th Cir. USCA) ~ It was held that a pro se complaint requires a less stringent reading than one drafted by a lawyer per Justice Black in Conley v. Gibson (see case listed above, Pro Se Rights Section).
Roadway Express v. Pipe, 447 U.S. 752 at 757 (1982) ~ "Due to sloth, inattention or desire to seize tactical advantage, lawyers have long engaged in dilatory practices... the glacial pace of much litigation breeds frustration with the Federal Courts and ultimately, disrespect for the law."
Sherar v. Cullen, 481 F. 2d 946 (1973) ~ "There can be no sanction or penalty imposed upon one because of his exercise of Constitutional Rights."
Schware v. Board of Examiners, United State Reports 353 U.S. pages 238, 239. ~ "The practice of law cannot be licensed by any state/State."
Sims v. Aherns, 271 SW 720 (1925) ~ "The practice of law is an occupation of common right."
As advised by lawyers ( Greenberg, Baisden & Perez, LLC Attorney at Law ), separating and/or divorcing parents often make false allegations of domestic violence (DV) in the form of a restraining order to evict an innocent parent from the home, interfere with contact with child/ren, and then file for temporary custody (virtually never temporary). False police reports are often obtained and used in DV Court...called "information only reports", but contain a fabricated incident of DV and thus a serious crime if and when exposed.
Delete"The moral arc of the universe bends at the elbow of justice." ~ MLK, Jr.
http://adrianbuckmaster.wordpress.com/category/family-courts-and-childrens-rights/
ReplyDelete"An honorable defeat is better than a dishonorable victory." ~ Millard Fillmore
ReplyDeletehttp://www.dadshouseedctr.org/visitation/denial
ReplyDeletehttp://www.dadshouseedctr.org/attorneys-you/court-watch
HOW DID CHILDREN OF DIVORCE GET STUCK WITH THE VISITATION PLAN THAT AFFORDS THEM ACCESS TO THEIR NON-RESIDENTIAL PARENT ONLY ONE NIGHT DURING THE WEEK AND EVERY OTHER WEEK-END?
ReplyDeleteWhat is the research that supports such a schedule? Where is the data that confirms that such a plan is in the best interest of the child?
Well, reader, you can spend your time from now until eternity researching the literature, and YOU WILL NOT DISCOVER ANY SUPPORTING DATA for the typical visitation arrangement with the non-residential parent! The reality is that this arrangement is based solely on custom. And just like the short story, "The Lottery," in which the prizewinner is stoned to death, the message is that deeds and judgments are frequently arrived at based on nothing more than habit, fantasy, prejudice, and yes, on "junk science."
This family therapist upholds the importance of both parents playing an active and substantial role in their children's lives----especially in situations when the parents are apart. In order to support the goal for each parent to provide a meaningfully and considerable involvement in the lives of their children, I affirm that the resolution to custody requires an arrangement for joint legal custody and physical custody that maximizes the time with the non-residential----with the optimal arrangement being 50-50, whenever practical. It is my professional opinion that the customary visitation arrangement for non-residential parents to visit every other weekend and one night during the week is not sufficient to maintain a consequential relationship with their children. Although I have heard matrimonial attorneys, children's attorneys, and judges assert that the child needs the consistency of the same residence, I deem this assumption to be nonsense. I cannot be convinced that the consistency with one's bed trumps consistency with a parent!
Should the reader question how such an arrangement can be judiciously implemented which maximizes the child's time---even in a 50-50 arrangement----with the non-residential parent, I direct the reader to the book, Mom's House, Dads House, by the Isolina Ricci, PhD.
Indeed, the research that we do have supports the serious consequences to children when the father, who is generally the non-residential parent, does not play a meaningful role in lives of his children. The book, Fatherneed, (2000) by Dr. Kyle Pruitt, summarizes the research at Yale University about the importance of fathers to their children. And another post on this page summarizes an extensive list of other research.
Children of divorce or separation of their parents previously had each parent 100% of the time and obviously cannot have the same arrangement subsequent to their parents' separation. But it makes no sense to this family therapist that the result of parental separation is that the child is accorded only 20% time with one parent and 80% with the other. What rational person could possibly justify this?
Review from the late Carl Fredrich, founder of the American Pro Se Association
ReplyDelete2012 ~
" "How to Win a Lawsuit Without Hiring a Lawyer" is a very informative book -- and for those who find themselves in certain circumstances it can be said to be indispensable. The book might be more appropriately entitled: "Pursuing A Lawsuit Without A Lawyer: Even Against the Authorities." This book, as far as we know, is the only simplified low cost resource addressing an area of increasing need -- where one's rights have been trampled or denied by police or other officials and how you can do something affordable about it. The book actually contains an enormous amount of information and legal theories and specific instructions on how to proceed with respect to a number of issues.
Considering it is a generic law book written to address both Federal and all 50 states laws, it possesses both the advantages and drawbacks inherent in covering so much territory. The book also addresses this difficult problem and stresses the need to consult specific state statutes and/or the necessary specific information on any administrative law forums should they be applicable. (These are often called 'administrative law court' but they are really central panels of the administrative branch -- not judicial branch of government.)
Presumptive Best Interest of Child and Equal Time-Sharing
ReplyDeleteThere is no question that our family law statutes need to be reformed and that there is a great deal of "judicial discretion" in family law matters. Often times, the outcome of your case depends more on the judge that you have been assigned than the facts of your particular case. If you were to have your case in front of one judge, the outcome may be very different if you were to have your case in front of a different judge. The legislature is trying to change that, in particular when it comes to time-sharing with children. There are changes to alimony as well that I will address in a later blog, but I wanted my readers to be aware of the changes that are being proposed for time-sharing because it is substantial. If the Bill passes, there will now be a presumption that equal (50/50) time-sharing is in a child's best interest, with very limited exceptions. The exceptions would be in the nature of real harm to a child that a parent is incarcerated, a parent is unfit, or the parent's geographical distance would hinder the ability for a 50/50 time-sharing schedule to work. If this passes and is signed into law, most families would be automatically forced into a 50/50 timesharing arrangement if one party were to want that. I have had plenty of cases in the past and some cases right now where one parent does not want an equal time-sharing schedule for a variety of different reasons. Some reasons are valid; some reasons are not valid enough to take the issue before the Court. With this new law, if it is passed, every family will be forced into a 50/50 schedule provided that one parent is requesting it. We do a lot of 50/50 time-sharing arrangements and have had a Judge rule many times that 50/50 is what a couple is going to have, but there are many families who want to alter or adjust this schedule after the final hearing because the schedule is simply not working. Absent a substantial and permanent change of circumstances, couples are going to be stuck with these schedules, regardless of whether or not it’s "working". I agree with the idea that if we have a presumption that 50/50 is in the children's best interest, there will be less room for argument and people would have to acquiesce on this issue. Taking any argument off the table that 50/50 is not good because a parent simply doesn't want it will help insure that less litigation ensues over "best interest of the children". However, what I don't agree with is that we should take the approach of "one size fits all" when it comes to dealing with children. It'll be interesting to see how this develops and if you have issue with this potential law, I urge you to contact your representative. By Christine Bauer - A Florida Family Law Attorney
Posted FRIDAY, MARCH 22, 2013
FLORIDA TODAY - OPINION
DeleteWritten by Gordon E. Finley, Ph.D., Miami
While I applaud columnist Paul Flemming for a sound review of the issues in Saturday’s “Alimony bill will be great — for lawyers,” his bottom-line conclusion is dead wrong.
The proposed state alimony reform bill will reduce litigation, not increase litigation. A bit of history: For years, the divorce vultures (a.k.a., the Family Law Section of the Florida Bar) have conned the Florida Legislature into writing divorce legislation that maximizes litigation and thus maximizes their income. In part, they have accomplished this by maximizing judicial discretion, which in practice means endless conflict and, of course, endless paid litigation.
No matter what they may say, the divorce vultures are interested only in one thing — maximizing their income.
I can irrefutably demonstrate this point with Flemming’s own words: “Thomas Duggar, an attorney in Tallahassee and a member of the Florida Bar’s Family Law Section, said last week at a Tallahassee Bar Association meeting that the section has a $100,000 war chest to sway public opinion against the legislation.”
Do your readers honestly believe they are spending all this money so they will lose income? The divorce vultures get the message in terms of what alimony reform will cost them — and save the children, fathers and mothers of divorce. I regret Mr. Flemming did not do the same.
Full Disclosure: I am an alimony-paying divorced father of two young adult daughters and retired university divorce researcher with multiple research and scholarly publications on this topic.
Florida Judge and Lawyer Complaints
ReplyDeleteHow to file complaints against Florida Family Law Judges and Family Law Lawyers?
Each State has its own procedures for filing complaints against Judges. All states require a written and signed complaint. Some states have a form for you to fill out. Other States request a letter. Grievances of misconduct usually concern issues of conflict of interest or impartiality. Adverse rulings or judgments are not considered legitimate grievances. You must support the complaint to the JQC about the Florida Family Law Judge with sufficient documentation.
Florida Family Law Judge Complaints
Write to the Florida Judicial Qualifications Committee.
http://www.floridasupremecourt.org
Florida Family Law Judicial Complaint
Mailing Address
Judicial Qualifications Committee (JQC)
1110 Thomasville Road
Tallahassee, FL 32303
Telephone
850-488-1581
All states maintain an agency to process lawyer complaints. These disciplinary counsels can usually be found as a department of the state bar association or as a branch of the state Supreme Court. Complaints in Florida can be filed by filling out a form supplied by the disciplinary counsel or by writing a letter to The Florida Bar.
Florida Family Law Lawyer Complaints
The Florida Bar handles complaints about family law lawyers in Florida.
Mailing Address
The Florida Bar
651 E. Jefferson Street
Tallahassee, FL 32399-2300
Telephone
850-561-5600
"CHILDREN OF DIVORCE DESERVE FULL ACCESS TO BOTH PARENTS, WHENEVER POSSIBLE."
ReplyDeletePersonally, I can’t find anyone willing to reject that statement publicly. It’s a fundamental truth. We now have a wealth of evidence demonstrating children are better off, in most situations, when they have something near equal time with each parent. So why are shared-parenting bills are being rejected throughout the country?
Do legislators believe mothers are more important to children than fathers? For the most part, I don’t think so. Politicians are, however, under quite a bit of pressure from some very powerful anti-shared parenting special interests. Recently, we’ve seen these opponents contribute to shared-parenting bills failing to pass in South Dakota and Minnesota.
Some would argue disappointments like those are clear signs that shared parenting legislation will not happen anytime soon. The opposite is true. The near victories in these states and others is an enormous indication politicians are beginning to understand the vast majority of American citizens believe children of divorce deserve equal access to both parents, whenever possible.
In fact, South Dakota’s bill lost in a 21-13 Senate vote. That’s a swing of 5 senators. If merely 5 senators felt more pressure from South Dakotans than they did from special interests, South Dakota would have a shared parenting statute. We should commend the remaining politicians in South Dakota’s Senate for doing the right thing.
In Minnesota … well, Minnesota is a travesty. That bill passed, and on May 24, 2012 Governor Mark Dayton vetoed it. Governor Dayton claimed that both sides made “compelling arguments,” but because the “ramifications” of the legislation were “uncertain,” he decided to single-handedly overrule the will of his constituents and their representatives. Mr. Governor, unless you are ending slavery or beginning women’s suffrage, you will likely never have the benefit of “certainty” in your political career. Again, we should praise the Minnesotan politicians who voted for the bill.
Six people. Six people stopped two states from enacting shared parenting. Six people do not indicate shared parenting is a distant hope – they indicate profoundly that it is an imminent inevitability.
Mike Haskell is a divorced dad, shared parenting supporter and practicing family law attorney in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
ACFC is America's Shared Parenting Organization
"CHILDREN NEED BOTH PARENTS"
The members of the American Coalition for Fathers and Children dedicate ourselves to the creation of a family law system and public awareness which promotes equal rights for ALL parties affected by issues of the modern family.
ACFC is challenging the current system of American family law and policy. Through a national system of local affiliates and in alliance with other pro-family and civil liberties groups, ACFC is shifting the public debate to the real causes of family dissolution.
Hey Bio-Mom,
ReplyDeleteI see you have found our little club here and you've decided to troll around for a bit. I first would like to say "welcome" on behalf of the men and women who suffer daily inside and outside these pages. We are glad you are here.
Feel free to take your time and peruse the stories of men and women who have lost everything.
Take in the agony and the pain, read the horror stories of men who havn't seen their children in 6 weeks, 6 months or 6 years. You will notice that all the stories share a familiar tone. The pain is real. The disbelief is palpable. The constant barrage of men ready to give up is unfortunately true. They may give up and stop fighting vindictive exes for their children and just move on, only to be later called a deadbeat loser from the same woman that deprived him of his children. They may give up and eat a bullet, jump from a bridge or tie a noose around their neck and say their final goodbye. You win, they lose. You are now an accessory to murder.
Stick around and look at the pictures of the children that are left behind. These are the other victims. The victims without a voice in all of this. Had they had a choice they would almost always choose to have a loving caring father by their side. You deprive them of that. Not only do you assist in the murdering of fathers, but you're also a child abuser. Congratulations.
Be sure to keep coming back to our little club here. Make jokes about how we are all domestic abusers who feel we have some ghastly privilege of fathering our children. Keep your kids close to you, be sure you cash that child support check and keep the children from Daddy if he misses a payment. It's only a fair punishment for him. Make him suffer. Make him hurt so bad he stays awake at night crying because he misses his kids so badly. Make him out to be the deadbeat you just know he is. Make his feel the depths of depression and despair by keeping his kids from him. Threaten to have him arrested and thrown in jail for inability to pay child support. You're cruising now bio-mom. You show them who is boss. Don't allow him to talk to his kids on the phone. Don't allow him to have one extra minute of "visitation". Marginalize him and make him feel what a scumbag he truly is. Don't tell him of your children's accomplishment or how they are doing in school. Keep any and all medical records from him. Keep him guessing who is with his children and where they are living. Keep doing what you are doing bio-mom. Now we all know who the boss is. It was never the judges or lawyers who caused all this. It was you.
Now look down at your children and realize everything you have done to your ex has also been done to them.
See, you are a child abuser after all.
Sleep tight,
Joe Makem
Thank you so much for all the support! We added a YouTube Video to the Petition!! We hope you enjoy this very short video of Zoraya's dad and brother. FYI - Honorable Judge Dale C. Cohen, a senior family court Judge in the 17th Judicial Circuit... view full update of Florida Family Court Miami-Dade STOP Denial of Reasonable Parent/Child Contact - Stand Up For Zoraya http://www.care2.com/c2c/people/profile.html?pid=580309157
ReplyDelete