Children should not be allowed to drive the visitation bus!

Post by David Inguanzo.

By Linda J. Gottlieb, L.M.F.T., L.C.S.W. ~

To any rational, mature, objective parent or professional, the reason for this declaration could be justified by merely pondering the following question: "How reassured would you feel if you were standing trial for a crime, and your jury was comprised entirely of 18-year-olds?"

The reason children should not be empowered to make a decision about visitation with a parent is as obvious as why no one would feel comfortable having only 18 year olds sitting in judgment of us. A child's judgment, insight, perception, reality testing, and emotions only barely reach maturity by the END of adolescence. One only has to read the epistemological research and studies undertaken by Jean Piaget, philosopher and developmental psychologist, who wrote the "Bible" upon which educators rely to understand the cognitive development of children.

Children do not have the emotional and cognitive abilities do evaluate for themselves what is in their best interests; to theorize what it would be like to have a parent eradicated from their lives; to be able to discriminate what is rational, truthful, and moral amidst all the information their parents and other adults impart to them---especially about the malicious, fabricated, and fanciful data from the alienating parent. Children, for example, think very concretely until the age of 8; that is why they actually do believe, "Step on a crack, break my mother's back."

Not until much older, can they discriminate reality from fantasy, which is why they should not see horror shows until much older. The ability to think abstractly starts at the beginning of adolescence and is still insufficiently mature by 18. Children lack wisdom! And children further do not have the emotional wherewithal to contradict the alienating parent----if that parent is the residential parent----as they are so dependent upon that parent.

So to placate the alienated parent regarding the visit refusal, the court sanctions it by making an ineffective order for the child to undergo a course of individual therapy in the hopes of readying the child for a relationship with the alienated parent. Every time I hear the unsubstantiated platitude for the therapist, "to prepare the child for contact with the alienated parent," I want to erupt.

Because of their immature cognitive and emotional abilities as previously discussed, children do not possess the facility for abstraction. They cannot participate in a theoretical discussion about what an appropriate relationship entails; nor can they comprehend a desire for something in the abstraction. A child, therefore, cannot have a discussion about desiring a relationship with someone who is in the absentia----especially a brainwashed child; nor can a child participate in determining what to expect from the relationship with that "someone."

I Was Falsely Accused of Domestic Violence...Now My Child Suffers

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

State Domestic Violence Legislative Project » SAVE: Stop Abusive and Violent Environments

The Violence Against Women Act provides grants to state and local law-enforcement agencies, prosecutors, and courts to establish and enforce domestic violence laws and policies. But there is a growing belief that many of these policies are harmful to victims and give rise to false allegations

www.mediaradar.org/

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Despite the new VAWA Inclusion Mandate, some DV organizations are still denying the extent of abuse for certain victim groups, and ignoring the problem of mutual violence altogether.

SAVE worries these factual biases may turn Domestic Violence Awareness Month into DV "Un-Awareness" Month. Join SAVE's Trick or Truth campaign so the American public learns the truth of domestic violence!

We want to contrast the new VAWA Inclusion Mandate (highlighted on the SAVE home page) and Sen. Leahy's mantra, "A victim is a victim is a victim," with the biased statements on the NNEDV fact sheet.

Post by Miami-Dade Commission on Ethics & Public Trust.

Related articles

• GOP won't protect survivors of domestic violence
• Florida legislators have been asked to look into reforms to help husbands who claim they have been victims of false domestic violence injunctions.
• Violence Against Women Act - 21st Anniversary
• 'Millionaire Matchmaker' contestant accused of domestic violence
• The Role of Domestic Violence in Parental Alienation
• Children are the real victims of gender bias in family courts
• The False Domestic Violence Allegation Epidemic
• Family Court in Crisis - The Sunday Telegraph
• A Circle of Moms Reports on False Allegations to CPS (and Says the Same Things That Father's Groups Say about the Abuse of Restraining Orders and Domestic Violence Laws)
• The False Allegations Of Domestic Violence Epidemic ~ #DomesticViolence

I Love My Daughter

Happy Birthday Zoraya! I love you and miss you so much!!

A POEM FROM DADDY

The moment you came into this world
your cry was for me the sweetest word. 
I used to hold you in my arms
singing gently till sleep comes.
I used to drive away all fear …
Made you feel safe when I was near …
I was the first to see you walk …
I was the first to hear you talk …
When “papa” came out of your mouth
I was the happiest man from north to south …
I used to feed you milk in a bottle.
I was a poney and you sat on my saddle.
I was a plane, an animal, or even a train …
Just for your laugh I did things insane …
I used to tell you stories before “goodnight”
Whenever you were sad, I made everything right…
We made drawings of you, mom and dad.
I thank God for the good times we had!
We bought flowers, sweets and presents for mummy
made cards for her with love like honey …
We played music and sang and danced.
From all we did, this is just a glance …

A glance of the past … Now I am far away …
Not being able to see you every day …
I’m now not able to show you my love
to share with you sweet moments like the ones we used to have …
So now my child what else can I say?
I hope you are well, only this is what I wish and pray.